A couple months ago I was kind of in a “time of need” and texted a friend, hoping to get some comfort & was very abruptly shot down.
I don’t want to reveal the texts or who it was or sound like a baby but it’s been in the back of my mind since that night & it has really made me very conscious of who I give my time & energy to at work.
I met this friend at work & considered this person a close friend after a couple months of hanging out & a lot of time sharing secrets & stories & the like.
Isn’t it weird how you may make a friend at work, who works in the same dept, or floor, or just has the same schedule, and the when one of those factors change, the friendship becomes…a “moo point”? I can’t wrap my head around it. They’re sort of like a friend one might make in a college course. You’re in the same class, you exchange notes, exchange numbers, message on FB, hit up their dorm room for study parties, and once the semester ends, you never hear from them again.
Some people may be great at making these “intermittent friends” but I struggle with the notion of having a friend of convenience. Everyone does this and I’ve done it, but the thought makes me feel so uncomfortable, like such a fake, like a phony.
It makes me question a lot. Thats where my insecurities kick in. Do they like me? Are we compatible? Are they using me? Is this just a phase? Do they have commitment issues? I know I do. Do they know that? Should they? WHO AM I?!!?!!!!
Anyway, just had to get this off my mind tonight.